[ the moonlight washes over him, wresting him out of his slumber. it was easier to get a day’s worth as of late — he knows the reason why, but there isn’t much point in saying it aloud.
through the slits of his eyes, cloud’s face is in plain sight. delicate cheekbones, long eyelashes, pink tinted lips he’d memorized the shape of by now — a hand moves of its own accord, thumbing at his nose.
there is a selfish part of him that wants to spend eternity like this. the part of him that wants to be tangible, that wants to be, even in spite of the pain. for a moment, he indulges it. nier wonders if this is how the couples and apple cheeked families he had known lived. was this what they felt every morning? a warm, comforting flutter in your chest, one that spreads to your ribcage and lights you up like the sun?
it doesn’t really matter. gently, he presses a kiss to cloud’s forehead, drawing him closer with a shove to his back. ]
[He's a light sleeper for multiple reasons. The first being his military background. Some habits, such as 4am wakeup calls were impossible to break. But the second is what he is now. A wolf, by its very nature, is a creature that sleeps lightly- sleeps often, and always has one eye open, so to speak.
So as soon as he feels the press of Nier's lips on his forehead, his eyes open- bright, chemical blue dimly refracting back what little light the moon affords them, and absolutely ruining any allusion to any form of delicateness his features might have provided otherwise.
He's shoved, and he freely, if a little sluggishly, moves toward him, lifting his head to press the side of his face against an ice-cold shoulder. And as his tail starts up... (damn it.)]
Yeah. We're pretty low on a lot of things.
[Organmeats. Skin. Flesh. Even bones. But most of all, blood.]
If we leave it another night and have a bad hunt tomorrow, might have to blend what we've got together.
[A hail mary at best. And not a great idea. A mish-mash of remaining organs in a blender does not constitute blood of a decent quality for a hungry vampire.
Howver pertinent that fact, He can't help but press his head a little further in to the chill of Nier's skin. And perhaps a little more lazily than he'd like... ]
[ he's being indulged and he knows it. but mutual induglence, who ever said that was an issue? one hand roams down cloud's spine, settling at the small of his back, tracing small circles through his shirt. the wag of his tail never goes unnoticed either — the sight of it out of the corner of his eye is enough to make his lips furl into a smile. ]
A little longer. [ he nestles closer, until they're chest to chest again. there's an inhale as he breathes in cloud's scent. ] We can take care of your supply first. You need it more than I do...
[ no actual logic behind that sentiment, of course. there's another kiss pressed to his forehead, the smile on his face having yet to falter. ]
No reason we can't do both. Unless you want monster or witch blood.
[His tail is a menace. And if it wasn't for Nier appreciating it so much, he'd want it docked. ...Except not really. It's mortifying, sure, to have such a straightforward indicator of his feelings. To have something that darts between his legs when he's apprehensive, stands on end when he's pissed, and ...with Nier and Zack in particular, completely loses its mind. The fact it's so telling is infuriating, But docking...? too much. ...Especially since Nier actually seems to like it. ...In his own way.
Still. As they move closer, he loops his arms over and around Nier's shoulders, more than content with the tradeoff of being inhaled for the opportunity to brush his fingertips against the ends of his (...longer.) hair.]
If you want that...
['Come back afterwards' is what he wants to say. Because somewhere, even if he knows it's mostly for sustenance, part of him feels a little possessive. Still. He can't say that. So he simply trails off.
But then Nier changes the subject for them. And that sounds like a challenge, so with a glance upward-]
It's okay. You look like you're really enjoying it though.
[ it’s more of an embrace than anything else at this point; it’s welcomed, even if the idea of physical touch would have made him recoil years ago. it was less like touching, more like slipping into a second skin. he willingly melts into the heat of cloud’s body, another breath as he idly shifts against him. ]
I might have to. [ there’s a meaningful pause. ] I know I can’t feed from you. It’s alright.
[ it’s said bluntly, although he’s careful in his words, hoping to be more soothing than harsh. settling for the blood of his game wasn’t enough. the stakes were higher, now that there were people to protect. being a second rate hunter at best wasn’t viable. ]
I guess I am. [ his smirk is practically audible. ] You make it hard not to.
[Does he? Well, the idea of it's not exactly something he likes. Probably the wolf part of him- as well as the desire to... well, live. He knows that Nier wouldn't take enough to kill him. Or even harm him. But the part of his brain, the thing people call fight or flight? Nope.
Not like it'll ever get to that. That, unfortunately, is not his biggest concern.]
The stuff you overheard that night means I can't. I'm human. Or was human before coming here. But even so... [He lifts his head then, to look him in the face.] I don't want to hurt you.
[Feeding off him would hurt him. In a big way. He's sure of it. He's seen what happens. Experienced it, too.]
That includes making you sick. [Pause.] Where do you go, when you need that kind of thing, anyway? Do you have a deal with someone, or?
[Or does he flit into someone's window as a bat and do it like vampires do in old storybooks? He's curious.
And that curiosity comes with a leg shifting, and settling in a loose hold around his. His hands continue to trail through his hair. But the compliment makes him move his eyes away, just a little self-consciously.]
[ the conversation is still fresh in his mind, so the implications register thoroughly enough. nier falls silent, turning the thought over and over again. let’s cloud speak, responds with a thoughtful hum at his question. ]
I used to go to my bondmate. But she’s been sick. [ his voice deepens a little, features hardening as it does. illnesses were...always a cause for concern. or panic, rather. ] There are places for monsters like me, though. And people who offer blood instead of coin. It’s good enough for now.
[ another beat. ]
You still seem human to me. [ his fingers slip underneath his shirt. ] More than most people are.
[His expression changes at that- going from neutral to perturbed. Very perturbed, actually. Concern is quite clearly visible in his eyes. It wasn't too long ago that someone saying something like that would make him say it sounded like a 'them' problem. As the real him started to come back? Maybe he'd think it, but stay silent about it.
But just because this person's connected to Nier, much less the fact that by now, he's familiar with Nier's experiences of illness- he's concerned. Highly so.]
...She been to a doctor? It's not the- [Shades.] Cwyld, is it?
[He separates himself a little, just to view him at a proper angle. Even if Nier's hand is currently in his shirt, something he's not all that eager to stop. but he does.]
Not Cwyld. [ he's quick to correct him, if only to soothe himself. nier's throat tightens for a moment, and it's not difficult to sense the way he stiffens at the thought of her being ill. ] Something else. It's like...a cold. That's what they told me, but...
[ sickness. he doesn't do well with it. ]
I'm doing what I can for now. I'll find a cure if they won't. [ his eyes steel, and his fingers curl around cloud's waist, abdomen pressing against his back.
well, his presence had been more calming than he'd realized. ]
Your food supply and any herbs I can find are my priority.
If you need to spend more time with her, I get it.
[The selfish part of him doesn't want to even entertain that, but this is kind of beyond any form of selfishness. If he needs to be with her, even if he wants to stay with her for however long it took till she got better, then it's fine. Of course it is.]
It's okay. I can skip hunting until you're back. Buy my food, like everyone else, if I have to. Especially if you're not thinking about yourself.
[He said it. 'Your food supply and any herbs I can find are my priority'. If he could free at least 50% of that up, then...
A half-turn toward him, and... of course he can't complete it to face him. Not with him pressed up against his back like that. So instead, he reaches back, just to grab at the fabric of his waistband. And he holds it, lightly- fingertips stretching out to pad at the small of his back.]
I'll ask around for some meds, too. Someone might have something from their world that might help.
She's staying with the Coven. I can't spend time with her after hours, so...
[ there's a hint of resignation there — ultimately, it had been for the better. it gave him time to hunt for medicinalherbs instead of ruminating in his thoughts, letting them rot him to his core. nier lets a sigh loose, feeling his muscle relax slightly at cloud's touch. ]
No, I want to hunt. I forage for herbs — for her...and...I want to take care of you, too.
[ nier's eyes widen by a centimeter at the offer. they flit shut, like the patter of a wing, and his fingers close over cloud's. ]
Thank you. [ a beat. ] For always trying to help me.
[That'd be something. While it was pretty plain that she's not exactly being held against her will, or any such nonsense like that- it's pretty plain that Nier would probably want to see her a lot more than he had. Hell- the fact that the man was nocturnal wasn't conductive to seeing her all that much, 'after hours' directive and all.
Cloud... didn't exactly do well with rules, regulations, or directives. And getting into where he wasn't supposed to be, by now, was something of a talent.
He turns- properly this time, to press his head into the crook of the other man's neck, continuing to knead at the softer, less scarred skin of the small of the other's back. And his voice is low.
Go hunting, forage some things too. You do what you do, turn it into medicine, and I'll find a loose window, something like that. It'd be easy.
[ that almost makes him laugh — but it hits him quickly that there's some gravity to that promise. so instaed, turns his head back with wide eyes. that prompts a short breath, one born from surprise. ]
Cloud—...I don't want you get in trouble. It's okay, I...
[ he presses his nose into cloud's hair, fingers catching his. ]
The more I think about it, the better of an idea that sounds...what would they do? Send me to jail...?
[Not like he's got much (recognized...) experience with hospitals, but he imagines that'd happen? Jail time seems a little extreme for someone just sneaking in after hours to see someone he was worried about, after all. But.]
But that's if you get caught. You could always hide under her bed or in a closet or something while the medical staff're making their rounds.
[From... the way Nier seems to be, he wouldn't be surprised if the guy hadn't snuck into a girl's residence before. He... just seems the type. Underneath, well, everything.
But regardless, The more they talk about it, the more it seems a solid idea to sneak him in, and let him wander outside, as normal, when visiting hours are back on. He can even wait outside the place for him with an umbrella to keep the sun off him.
The only issue seems to be getting him in... But that's something for him to consider. Security here seems pretty lax, so he can't see it being that hard.
He's broken out of his thoughts by a vague, ticklish feeling of his cheek getting brushed by the side of Nier's face at the affectionate gesture, shifting slightly to brush his lips against his forehead.
At getting up...]
Yeah...
[Even if his voice is affirmative, the tightening of his fingers around Nier's should suggest his body's not in agreement. Honestly, most of him wants to stay exactly as they are. Even if it's unviable.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Huh
through the slits of his eyes, cloud’s face is in plain sight. delicate cheekbones, long eyelashes, pink tinted lips he’d memorized the shape of by now — a hand moves of its own accord, thumbing at his nose.
there is a selfish part of him that wants to spend eternity like this. the part of him that wants to be tangible, that wants to be, even in spite of the pain. for a moment, he indulges it. nier wonders if this is how the couples and apple cheeked families he had known lived. was this what they felt every morning? a warm, comforting flutter in your chest, one that spreads to your ribcage and lights you up like the sun?
it doesn’t really matter. gently, he presses a kiss to cloud’s forehead, drawing him closer with a shove to his back. ]
We have to go out later, don’t we?
no subject
So as soon as he feels the press of Nier's lips on his forehead, his eyes open- bright, chemical blue dimly refracting back what little light the moon affords them, and absolutely ruining any allusion to any form of delicateness his features might have provided otherwise.
He's shoved, and he freely, if a little sluggishly, moves toward him, lifting his head to press the side of his face against an ice-cold shoulder. And as his tail starts up... (damn it.)]
Yeah. We're pretty low on a lot of things.
[Organmeats. Skin. Flesh. Even bones. But most of all, blood.]
If we leave it another night and have a bad hunt tomorrow, might have to blend what we've got together.
[A hail mary at best. And not a great idea. A mish-mash of remaining organs in a blender does not constitute blood of a decent quality for a hungry vampire.
Howver pertinent that fact, He can't help but press his head a little further in to the chill of Nier's skin. And perhaps a little more lazily than he'd like... ]
...We going?
no subject
A little longer. [ he nestles closer, until they're chest to chest again. there's an inhale as he breathes in cloud's scent. ] We can take care of your supply first. You need it more than I do...
[ no actual logic behind that sentiment, of course. there's another kiss pressed to his forehead, the smile on his face having yet to falter. ]
Didn't realize you liked this so much.
no subject
[His tail is a menace. And if it wasn't for Nier appreciating it so much, he'd want it docked. ...Except not really. It's mortifying, sure, to have such a straightforward indicator of his feelings. To have something that darts between his legs when he's apprehensive, stands on end when he's pissed, and ...with Nier and Zack in particular, completely loses its mind. The fact it's so telling is infuriating, But docking...? too much. ...Especially since Nier actually seems to like it. ...In his own way.
Still. As they move closer, he loops his arms over and around Nier's shoulders, more than content with the tradeoff of being inhaled for the opportunity to brush his fingertips against the ends of his (...longer.) hair.]
If you want that...
['Come back afterwards' is what he wants to say. Because somewhere, even if he knows it's mostly for sustenance, part of him feels a little possessive. Still. He can't say that. So he simply trails off.
But then Nier changes the subject for them. And that sounds like a challenge, so with a glance upward-]
It's okay. You look like you're really enjoying it though.
[Combative? Only marginally (playfully) so.]
no subject
I might have to. [ there’s a meaningful pause. ] I know I can’t feed from you. It’s alright.
[ it’s said bluntly, although he’s careful in his words, hoping to be more soothing than harsh. settling for the blood of his game wasn’t enough. the stakes were higher, now that there were people to protect. being a second rate hunter at best wasn’t viable. ]
I guess I am. [ his smirk is practically audible. ] You make it hard not to.
no subject
[Does he? Well, the idea of it's not exactly something he likes. Probably the wolf part of him- as well as the desire to... well, live. He knows that Nier wouldn't take enough to kill him. Or even harm him. But the part of his brain, the thing people call fight or flight? Nope.
Not like it'll ever get to that. That, unfortunately, is not his biggest concern.]
The stuff you overheard that night means I can't. I'm human. Or was human before coming here. But even so... [He lifts his head then, to look him in the face.] I don't want to hurt you.
[Feeding off him would hurt him. In a big way. He's sure of it. He's seen what happens. Experienced it, too.]
That includes making you sick. [Pause.] Where do you go, when you need that kind of thing, anyway? Do you have a deal with someone, or?
[Or does he flit into someone's window as a bat and do it like vampires do in old storybooks? He's curious.
And that curiosity comes with a leg shifting, and settling in a loose hold around his. His hands continue to trail through his hair. But the compliment makes him move his eyes away, just a little self-consciously.]
no subject
I used to go to my bondmate. But she’s been sick. [ his voice deepens a little, features hardening as it does. illnesses were...always a cause for concern. or panic, rather. ] There are places for monsters like me, though. And people who offer blood instead of coin. It’s good enough for now.
[ another beat. ]
You still seem human to me. [ his fingers slip underneath his shirt. ] More than most people are.
no subject
But just because this person's connected to Nier, much less the fact that by now, he's familiar with Nier's experiences of illness- he's concerned. Highly so.]
...She been to a doctor? It's not the- [Shades.] Cwyld, is it?
[He separates himself a little, just to view him at a proper angle. Even if Nier's hand is currently in his shirt, something he's not all that eager to stop. but he does.]
You didn't say anything about it.
no subject
[ sickness. he doesn't do well with it. ]
I'm doing what I can for now. I'll find a cure if they won't. [ his eyes steel, and his fingers curl around cloud's waist, abdomen pressing against his back.
well, his presence had been more calming than he'd realized. ]
Your food supply and any herbs I can find are my priority.
no subject
[The selfish part of him doesn't want to even entertain that, but this is kind of beyond any form of selfishness. If he needs to be with her, even if he wants to stay with her for however long it took till she got better, then it's fine. Of course it is.]
It's okay. I can skip hunting until you're back. Buy my food, like everyone else, if I have to. Especially if you're not thinking about yourself.
[He said it. 'Your food supply and any herbs I can find are my priority'. If he could free at least 50% of that up, then...
A half-turn toward him, and... of course he can't complete it to face him. Not with him pressed up against his back like that. So instead, he reaches back, just to grab at the fabric of his waistband. And he holds it, lightly- fingertips stretching out to pad at the small of his back.]
I'll ask around for some meds, too. Someone might have something from their world that might help.
no subject
[ there's a hint of resignation there — ultimately, it had been for the better. it gave him time to hunt for medicinalherbs instead of ruminating in his thoughts, letting them rot him to his core. nier lets a sigh loose, feeling his muscle relax slightly at cloud's touch. ]
No, I want to hunt. I forage for herbs — for her...and...I want to take care of you, too.
[ nier's eyes widen by a centimeter at the offer. they flit shut, like the patter of a wing, and his fingers close over cloud's. ]
Thank you. [ a beat. ] For always trying to help me.
no subject
[That'd be something. While it was pretty plain that she's not exactly being held against her will, or any such nonsense like that- it's pretty plain that Nier would probably want to see her a lot more than he had. Hell- the fact that the man was nocturnal wasn't conductive to seeing her all that much, 'after hours' directive and all.
Cloud... didn't exactly do well with rules, regulations, or directives. And getting into where he wasn't supposed to be, by now, was something of a talent.
He turns- properly this time, to press his head into the crook of the other man's neck, continuing to knead at the softer, less scarred skin of the small of the other's back. And his voice is low.
Go hunting, forage some things too. You do what you do, turn it into medicine, and I'll find a loose window, something like that. It'd be easy.
no subject
Cloud—...I don't want you get in trouble. It's okay, I...
[ he presses his nose into cloud's hair, fingers catching his. ]
The more I think about it, the better of an idea that sounds...what would they do? Send me to jail...?
[ maybe. ]
Ah! We need to get up soon...
no subject
[Not like he's got much (recognized...) experience with hospitals, but he imagines that'd happen? Jail time seems a little extreme for someone just sneaking in after hours to see someone he was worried about, after all. But.]
But that's if you get caught. You could always hide under her bed or in a closet or something while the medical staff're making their rounds.
[From... the way Nier seems to be, he wouldn't be surprised if the guy hadn't snuck into a girl's residence before. He... just seems the type. Underneath, well, everything.
But regardless, The more they talk about it, the more it seems a solid idea to sneak him in, and let him wander outside, as normal, when visiting hours are back on. He can even wait outside the place for him with an umbrella to keep the sun off him.
The only issue seems to be getting him in...
But that's something for him to consider. Security here seems pretty lax, so he can't see it being that hard.
He's broken out of his thoughts by a vague, ticklish feeling of his cheek getting brushed by the side of Nier's face at the affectionate gesture, shifting slightly to brush his lips against his forehead.
At getting up...]
Yeah...
[Even if his voice is affirmative, the tightening of his fingers around Nier's should suggest his body's not in agreement. Honestly, most of him wants to stay exactly as they are. Even if it's unviable.]